Emotional affairs are often overlooked and underestimated, but they can be just as damaging as physical affairs. In fact, some may argue that emotional affairs are even more harmful because they involve a deep emotional connection with someone outside of the relationship.
But what exactly is an emotional affair, and how can you prevent it from happening in your own relationship? In this article, we’ll explore the definition of an emotional affair, the warning signs to look out for, and tips for preventing emotional affairs in relationships.
What is an Emotional Affair?
An emotional affair is a close, intimate relationship with someone outside of your committed partnership. It involves sharing personal thoughts, feelings, and experiences with this person, often at the expense of your partner.
Emotional affairs can start innocently enough, with a friendship or a work relationship, but they can quickly escalate into something more intimate and damaging. They often involve secrecy, deception, and a strong emotional connection that can rival that of a romantic relationship.
Warning Signs of an Emotional Affair
Emotional Distance from Your Partner
One of the most significant warning signs of an emotional affair is a growing emotional distance between you and your partner. You may find yourself confiding in someone else instead of your partner, or you may feel more connected to this person than your significant other.
Increased Secrecy
Another red flag is an increase in secrecy. If you find yourself hiding your interactions with this person from your partner, it could be a sign that your relationship has crossed the line into an emotional affair.
Constant Thoughts About the Other Person
Do you find yourself constantly thinking about this person, even when you’re with your partner? If so, it could be a sign that your feelings for this person have gone beyond a platonic friendship.
Emotional Intimacy
Emotional affairs often involve a deep emotional connection with the other person. You may find yourself sharing personal details and feelings with them that you haven’t shared with your partner.
Physical Attraction
While emotional affairs don’t always involve physical intimacy, there is often a strong physical attraction between the two people involved. If you find yourself feeling attracted to this person, it could be a sign that your relationship has crossed the line.
How to Prevent Emotional Affairs
Communicate Openly and Honestly
Open and honest communication is crucial in any relationship, but it’s especially important in preventing emotional affairs. Make sure to communicate your feelings and needs with your partner, and encourage them to do the same. This will help build trust and strengthen your relationship.
Set Boundaries
It’s essential to set boundaries in your relationship to prevent emotional affairs. This could mean avoiding one-on-one interactions with someone you find attractive or limiting the amount of time you spend with them. It’s also crucial to establish boundaries with your partner, such as not sharing personal details about your relationship with others.
Prioritize Your Relationship
In the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it’s easy to let your relationship take a backseat. But it’s crucial to prioritize your relationship and make time for each other. Plan date nights, take trips together, and make an effort to connect with your partner regularly.
Be Mindful of Your Interactions with Others
It’s natural to have friendships and relationships outside of your partnership, but it’s essential to be mindful of these interactions. Avoid sharing personal details or feelings with someone of the opposite sex, and make sure to include your partner in group activities to avoid any potential emotional affairs.
Seek Professional Help
If you feel like your relationship is at risk of an emotional affair, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. A therapist can help you and your partner work through any underlying issues and provide tools for strengthening your relationship.
Is an Emotional Affair Grounds for Divorce?
The answer to this question is not a simple yes or no. Every relationship is different, and the decision to end a marriage is a personal one. However, emotional affairs can be just as damaging as physical affairs, and they can cause significant trust issues and emotional pain in a relationship.
If you’re considering divorce due to an emotional affair, it’s essential to seek professional help and communicate openly with your partner before making any decisions.
Real-Life Examples of Emotional Affairs
The Office Crush
John and Sarah have been married for ten years, and John has always had a crush on his coworker, Emily. They often work on projects together and have developed a close friendship. John starts confiding in Emily about his marriage problems, and they begin to spend more time together outside of work. Eventually, John starts to develop feelings for Emily, and their relationship becomes more intimate.
The Rekindled Flame
Samantha and Mark have been married for fifteen years, and their relationship has become stale. Samantha starts reconnecting with an old high school friend, Alex, on social media. They start messaging each other regularly, and Samantha begins to confide in Alex about her marriage problems. They eventually meet up in person, and their relationship becomes more intimate.
Conclusion
Emotional affairs can be just as damaging as physical affairs, and they can cause significant trust issues and emotional pain in a relationship. By communicating openly and honestly, setting boundaries, and prioritizing your relationship, you can prevent emotional affairs from happening in your own relationship. Remember, if you feel like your relationship is at risk, don’t be afraid to seek professional help.
References
- Gottman, John M., and Nan Silver. “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.” Crown, 2015.
- Glass, Shirley P. “NOT ‘Just Friends’: Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity.” Free Press, 2004.
- Perel, Esther. “The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity.” Harper, 2017.
- Mayo Clinic. “Infidelity: Mending your marriage after an affair” Retrieved from https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/infidelity/art-20048424
- American Psychological Association (APA). “Love and Attraction.” Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/helpcenter/love.aspx
- National Institute of Mental Health. “Social Wellness Toolkit.” Retrieved from https://www.nih.gov/health-information/social-wellness-toolkit
