Helping Your Child Navigate Tantrum Triggers: A Guide for Parents of 7-Year-Olds

As parents, we all want the best for our children. But sometimes, dealing with a 7-year-old’s temper tantrums can be challenging. At Davenport Psychology, we understand this struggle and are here to help. This blog post will provide you with practical strategies to navigate these tantrum triggers effectively.

Understanding 7-Year-Old Temper Tantrums

First, it’s important to understand that tantrums are a normal part of child development. However, if your 7-year-old is having regular, uncontrollable outbursts, it may suggest an underlying cause that needs to be addressed. These could be due to a lack of co-regulation, family discord, neurodiversity, or childhood trauma.

Psychological and Developmental Factors Contributing to Tantrums

Tantrums are a common occurrence in children, particularly as they begin to assert their independence from parents and caregivers1. They can be triggered by a variety of factors, including frustration, tiredness, and hunger2. However, frequent or intense tantrums may indicate underlying issues such as lack of co-regulation, family discord, neurodiversity, or childhood trauma2.

Psychological Factors Psychological factors such as stress, anxiety, and trauma can contribute to tantrums3. Behavioral difficulties, such as anger outbursts and low-frustration tolerance, can also occur with conditions such as ADHD, depression, anxiety, and autism spectrum disorder3. Extreme anxiety can cause tantrums, and children with ADHD are prone to outbursts due to poor impulse control and difficulty tolerating boredom2.

Developmental Factors Developmental factors also play a significant role in tantrums. As children start to establish their independence and attempt more complex tasks, they are likely to have episodes of being overwhelmed emotionally, leading to tantrums1. Undiagnosed learning disorders can cause children to explode in frustration2.

While temper tantrums are normal, if they are unusually severe and/or frequent, they might signal a neurodevelopmental condition such as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, problems with anxiety or depression, or a more general pattern of defiance toward adults, which could lead to a diagnosis of oppositional defiant disorder4.

Dr. Charles Davenport reassures parents, “having a tantrum as a 7-year-old is a normal expected part of healthy child development. If you are concerned, please call me.” Call Davenport Psychology today 941-702-2457!

References

  1. American Academy of Pediatrics. (2003). Managing Temper Tantrums1.
  2. Child Mind Institute. (n.d.). Why Do Kids Have Tantrums and Meltdowns?2.
  3. Yale Medicine. (n.d.). Does Your Child Have Tantrums? Should You Be Worried?3.
  4. Positive Psychology. (2024). Taming Temper Tantrums: Behavior Management for Toddlers4

Strategies to Manage Tantrums

Here are some strategies that can help manage your child’s tantrums:

Empathetic Interactions:

Guidance on Empathetic Interactions: Empathetic interactions are crucial in managing tantrums and fostering a healthy emotional environment for children. 

  • Active Listening: Pay full attention to the child, showing genuine interest in what they’re expressing.
  • Non-Verbal Communication: Use body language, such as nodding and maintaining eye contact, to show that you’re engaged in the conversation.
  • Reflecting and Validating Feelings: Acknowledge the child’s feelings and validate them. This could be as simple as saying, “I can see that you’re upset.”
  • Avoiding Judgment and Advice: Try not to judge the child’s feelings or offer unsolicited advice. Instead, provide a safe space for them to express themselves.
Child Psychologist at davenport Psychology in Sarasota and Venice FL offers strategies for managing tantrums.

Co-regulation:

Co-regulation is a collaborative process where parents actively support their children emotionally through empathetic interactions. This helps children develop self-regulating capabilities.

Examples of Co-Regulation in Action: Co-regulation is a process where adults help children manage their emotions by modeling calm behavior. Here are some examples of co-regulation in action:

  • During a Tantrum: A caregiver might help a child take slow, deep breaths. This physical action can help shift the child’s nervous system from a state of agitation to a state of calm, reducing the intensity of the tantrum.
  • In a Stressful Situation: An educator can create a quiet, safe space for a child who is feeling overwhelmed.
  • Daily Routine: Parents provide co-regulation support to their toddlers when they help them get organized to head out the door for preschool in the morning.
  • In a Group Setting: Program staff provide co-regulation support to program participants when they foster positive group norms that encourage inclusive engagement.
  • During Peer Interactions: Participants provide co-regulation support to their peers when they listen and help each other find solutions for reaching each others’ goals. Remember, co-regulation is a dynamic, interactive process that requires sensitivity and responsiveness to the child’s emotional needs. It’s about being present, engaged, and supportive, helping the child navigate their emotions and reactions in a healthy way.

Creating a Calm Environment

Children who witness frequent fighting between their parents may struggle to cope with such tense situations. Creating a calm and peaceful environment at home can help them process their emotions better.

Tips for a Peaceful Home Atmosphere: Here are some strategies to help you get there:

Clear the Clutter: A tidy home can help reduce stress and create a sense of calm. Regularly decluttering your living space can prevent feelings of being overwhelmed.

Keep Surfaces Clear: Keeping surfaces clear and organized can contribute to a more peaceful home environment.

Choose Neutral Colors: Opt for soothing colors like blue, green, or lavender to decorate your home. These colors can have a calming effect and contribute to a peaceful atmosphere.

Let the Light In: Natural light can have a positive impact on mood and create a brighter, more peaceful environment.

Use Essential Oils or Candles: Scents can have a powerful effect on our mood. Consider using essential oils or candles to create a relaxing scent in your home.

Impact of Parental Behavior on Children’s Emotional Well-being

Parental behavior plays a significant role in shaping children’s emotional well-being6789. Here are some key points to consider:

Emotion Regulation: Parents play a large role in shaping their child’s emotion regulation skills early in life. Supportive parenting is linked to positive outcomes in youth.

Parent Socialization of Emotion (PSE): PSE is the process through which parents communicate their values about emotional behaviors, teach their children to understand and control their emotions, and model appropriate emotional responses.

Parenting Style: Research has found that parents and caregivers that maintain a warm, communicative, and reasoned style of parenting raise children who have higher rates of socially competent behavior, take fewer drugs, and exhibit less anxiety or depression7.

Mindful Parenting: Mindful parenting directly leads to improved parenting (e.g., improved communication, parenting self-efficacy) and improved parental well-being (e.g., greater life satisfaction, higher positive affect, and lower negative affect), which in turn relates to more effective child management practices and greater parent–child affection8.

Remember, creating a peaceful home and fostering positive parental behaviors are ongoing processes. It’s okay to take small steps and make gradual changes. Your efforts will make a significant difference in your child’s emotional well-being and the overall atmosphere of your home.

Understanding Neurodiversity: Children with neurodivergent conditions, such as ADHD or autism, may encounter more challenges in controlling negative emotions. Understanding their unique cognitive processing styles can help in managing their tantrums.

Addressing Childhood Trauma: Childhood trauma can often result in children struggling to regain self-control when upset. Addressing these traumas with the help of a professional can be beneficial.

Seeking Professional Help

If your child’s tantrums continue to be a concern, it may be helpful to seek professional help. At Davenport Psychology, we offer individual therapy and counseling services for children. Our team of experienced psychologists can provide you with the necessary tools and strategies to manage your child’s tantrums effectively.

Conclusion

Remember, every child is unique, and what works for one might not work for another. It’s important to be patient and persistent in your efforts. If you’re in Sarasota or Venice, FL, and need help navigating your child’s tantrum triggers, don’t hesitate to reach out to us at Davenport Psychology.

Learn More

  1. Parenting for Brain. (2024). How To Deal With 7-Year-Old Temper Tantrums.
  2. Rooted Rhythm Therapy. (2023). 7 Year Old Emotional Meltdowns & Tantrums: How to Support Your Child.
  3. 7 Year Olds. (2018). How to Handle a 7-Year-Old Who Throws Tantrums.
  4. Child Mind Institute. (2024). Why Do Kids Have Tantrums and Meltdowns?.
  5. They Are The Future. (n.d.). 7 Year Old Temper Tantrums: 7 Easy Parent Strategies.

Please note that this blog post is for informational purposes only. It should not replace professional advice. If your child is struggling with tantrums, consider seeking help from a professional psychologist.

For more information about our services, please visit our website or contact us directly at (941) 702-2457. We’re here to help you and your family navigate these challenges and lead a happier, healthier life.

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